Enquirer Home Page | Twitter | Back to Improbable Island
 
Table of Contents

Attributes

Okay guys, so I'm working on a thing where you can love and flatter each other by sending Mementos with embedded stats like "+1 Pun Master." Probably because I've been reading JaneMcGonigal's book and it's made me come over all1) Community Game Love.

I need a list of positive attributes that either your character or you as a person would like associated with you. It'd be trivial to just Google for "positive attributes" and gank stuff off a list, but this is Improbable Island after all, and the attributes need to be at least a bit witty or interesting to read.

So, each attribute should be a couple of succinct words or one interesting word (for example, "Witty" is okay, but "Witwrangler" or "Wicked Wit" is better), and a very brief (like, one or two sentences) description or elaboration.

The mods and I came up with sixty between us, and I did little descriptions for a few of them; I don't know how many attributes I'd like to have, but the idea is to crowdsource, say, a couple of hundred, and then whittle it down to just the very best of them.

The Rules

  • Positive attributes only. Nobody wants to receive a present with a +1 in being a smelly dramallama with bad teeth.2)3)4)
  • Don't suggest that we just let players input their own attributes - 'cause then it wouldn't be special, would it? Games need restrictions, or they're not games.
  • Try to keep it alphabetical5), and try to keep the format consistent. I'm gonna find-and-replace up a PHP array out of this, y'see.
  • Likewise6),7) keep8) your9) traditional10) incessant11) footnotes12) out13) of14) the15) main list16) -17) they'll18) just19) make20) it21) hard22) to23) work24) with25) my26) code editor27)28) later29) on30).31)32)
  • Don't worry too much about making things that are a bit similar to other things. Like I said, we're gonna go through and just use the very best ones anyway.
  • If you find yourself starting your suggestion with "Good at. . ." then try again.
  • You don't have to use alliteration, but it helps.33)
  • Likewise puns. Puns are always good.34)

Go go go!

  • A Bad Joker; Spends more time in VOLUNTARY QUARANTINE than fighting monsters.
  • Abs Solver; With enough applied muscle or flexing, they can fix any problem. They accomplish this feat regularly!
  • Action Sequencer; This person knows how to set up a jaw-dropping action scene. Lights, camera, AWESOME!
  • Ad-lib Mad Lips; Never prepared, never needs to be.
  • Admirable Critchton; How can he DO all of that?
  • Admirable Critchton; Like a Mary Sue, only nicely done.
  • Adventurous Extrovert; This thrill-seeking contestant is never afraid to try something new and exciting.
  • Agile Acrobat; Voted most likely to be found on a trapeze.
  • Always the Altruist; So generous they'll give you the shirt off their back. And their trousers, if you ask nicely.
  • Armament Armani; So what if I'm wearing the GNP of four small countries, I look gooood.
  • Artful Analyst; They've got you read like a book, and they KNOW what did you do with the bodies.
  • Awesomely Organized; When you want something done but don't know where to start, this contestant keeps a cool head and get everything sorted.
  • Bald Soprano; She always wears her hair in the same style.
  • Barefoot Bokononist; Nice nice, very nice. "Maturity is a bitter disappointment for which no remedy exists, unless laughter can be said to remedy anything".
  • Barking Mad; Some contestants are completely bonkers, and this one is bonkers in a good way.
  • Behinder Minder; You like to look and you look at what you like.
  • Boo Radley; The best kind of idiot friend you could ever want. Great in a pinch.
  • BRAAAAINS; Exemplar of the Zombie race. Stagger on, friend!
  • Brilliant Buffoon; Sultan of Slapstick. Classiest of Clowns. Gives silliness a bright, bright sheen.
  • Buck Nekkid Brawler; Is there any other way to fight?
  • Buxom Wench; Emily's got competition.
  • Calm and Still; This contestant shows a Zen-like ability to keep their head while all around them are losing theirs.
  • Camera Charmer; "Alright, Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for my close-up."
  • Camera Shy; I am the very model of a modern mutant.
  • Can't Touch This; Stop Stand Still Time!
  • Carnievore; Poker face? Uncanny. Riddling? Savvy. Lives for the games.
  • Chainsaw-Chukster; Loves uncertainty in battle.
  • Chainsaw-chuk Aficionado; Where others fear pain, you embrace it.
  • Charlie Chaplain; you execute pratfalls with religious fervor and grace.
  • Charming Cheek; You want to ruffle their hair for everything they say.
  • Charming Smarm; This contestant can charm the pants off a brass monkey. When was the last time you saw a brass monkey, anyway?
  • Cocoa Connoisseur; Not only do you know all 137 varieties, you also know where they're from and their mothers' maiden names.
  • Cool Cat; pretty fly for a fictitious guy.
  • Couch Potato; Prefers the banter couch, almost to exclusivity. Always lurking thereabouts, ready to pounce with interesting and witty comments when you ask if anyone is there.
  • Crank Case; Your grumpiness makes us smile more than Grouchy puppets and tetchy Dwarves.
  • Crate Hunter; "Shhh! Be vewwy vewwy quiet.. I'm hunting cwates!"
  • Crate Masticator; Tears through the crunchy shell to get to the tasty filling.
  • Crate Whisperer; Crates come out of the woodwork for you.
  • Crate Wrangler; Crates desperately wish to be anything but a crate when you come near.
  • Creative Genius; This contestant has all the best ideas, and knows what to do with them.
  • Chronic Chrononaut; Newdays are just a blur to you.
  • Culinary Cunning; From kitchen to campstove, this contestant is a cookery expert.
  • Cunning Linguist; Possessor of multi faceted laughing gear.
  • Cuddle Monkey; They just love to be close, hugs are never in shortage.
  • Cute Butt; Sometimes it's just gotta be said.
  • Daredevil; Point them in the direction of the impossible!
  • Dark Horse; This contestant has hidden depths that you'll only find by being close to them.
  • Dashing Romantic; This contestant goes beyond flowers and chocolates - but we're not ones to kiss and tell.
  • D'awww; Just too cute for words.
  • Dazzling Dancer; Captivating.
  • Delightfully Mad; Bonkers, in a good way though!
  • Dependable Friend; Need a place to crash, a drink to quench your thirst, a bandage in that hard-to-reach spot? You know who to call.
  • Derring Doer; Displaying daring deeds in desperate disasters, a defender of all damsels in distress.
  • Diabolical Dialect; Can't always tell what they're saying, but they're good at saying it!
  • Diplomatic Tongue; Can make flinging yourself into an overrun Outpost with naught but a spork and frilly pink panties seem like a good idea.
  • Doggish Determinism; Loyal to the end. This is your Old Yeller. Without the rabies of course.
  • Effervescent Abolitionist; They are in favor of a change in island law, and quite enthusiastic in converting the masses. No more failboating! The rumors are true!
  • Effervescent Ebullitionist; Bubbling with enthusiasm all the time. Spreading joy is a job, a job they love.
  • Enchanting Entrant; Someone who, no matter what the place, time, or scene, makes themself known in an unforgettable manner.
  • Eternal Optimist; The glass is always half full, and those clouds sure look lovely today.
  • Eye for Detail; remembers if that mutant used its middle, left or back hand the most even with a ten-second glance.
  • Exquisite Courtesy; Always polite, no matter what.
  • Extra Bits; Exemplar of the Mutant race. Just keep your noodly appendages to yourself, please. And your poetry.
  • Failboat Cruisemaster; You can find it in the dark, with your eyes closed.
  • Fearless Leader; The one you follow, if only out of curiosity.
  • Fiery Passion; Trust your feelings.
  • Finn Mac Cool; You're an amiable enormous sort, aren't you?
  • Foolishly Friendly; This contestant is a good person, to a fault.
  • Frilly Pink Panties Fashionista; Pretty yet practical.. and cheap!
  • Furry Fury; You take catfight to a whole new level.
  • Fuzzball; Exemplar of the Kittymo-ooh, something shiny!
  • Gallant Gyro; Surpisingly heroic for something that shouldn't be able to do much. They are the beach ball/sandwich/workbench that defeated a Titan!
  • Generous Gifter; Presents! Yay!
  • Gentle Ear; Tell me what's wrong.
  • Gneiss Slice; The Great Pyramids would just be a weekend project for you.
  • Gracious Host; They run a good house.
  • Graceful Mover; Even a simple stride carries the grace of a dancer.
  • Gratuitously Geeky; For the super smart, or the cognitively crazed
  • Green Eyes; Exemplar of the Joker race. Game of cards, anyone?
  • Great Gadgeteer; A tinkerer. Designs tend to be useful, compact, and could belong on Batmans utility belt.
  • Grenade Garnish; A sprig of this, a frag of that. Voila! Monster sushi.
  • Ham on Wry; Over the top yet subtle, you magnificent bastard. Now get out of my sandwich.
  • Hammer Slammer; Bring the hurt.
  • Hammer Time; Every problem looks like a nail, when this is all you use.
  • Harvey Wallbanger; You really know how to nail it, literally.
  • Hattitude; Your headgear is positively haberdashing.
  • Helping Hand; Having a hard time? They'll be around shortly.
  • Heroes' Hero; Doer of deeds, creator of legends, all-around good guy/girl.
  • Holy Hedgehog; Audrey is crazy about you.
  • Honourable Genteel; Most impeccable in eloquence and dress.
  • Humpty Dumpty; They have tea on the fourth wall more often than not.
  • Hundred-Point Rally King/Queen; Finishes the rally before other contestants even start.
  • iBombaholic; "Come on, I need the cigz.. Argh! No, not the failboat!"
  • Improbably Successful; Don't tell them the odds.
  • Impulsive Explorer; Ooh, something new!
  • Inimitable Style; There can only be one, and this is them.
  • Ingenious Inventor; "Where does he get those wonderful toys?"
  • Innit?; Exemplar of the Midget race. Best kept at arm's length.
  • Inquisitive Bastard; One more question!
  • Inspiring Force; A mover and a shaker. When they're around, others are moved to action.
  • Irresistible Charm; A smile, a well-timed comment, even a look is all it takes them to befriend you.
  • Jack-of-All-Trades; Master of fun.
  • Join Them; An Honest clan leader.
  • Join Us; Advocates for their clan.
  • Julia's child; A cook that can make your shoes sumptuous.
  • Keeper of the Coin; You have lots of money. More than you know what to do with. And you know of a LOT of things to do with money.
  • Kind to Others; The title says it all.
  • KISS; Kittymorphs InSane Situations.
  • Knowledge Bank; Got a question? They've got answers.
  • Know It All; They know everything about everything and aren't afraid to show it.
  • Life of the Party; If they're here, you know things are going to be fun.
  • Like a quiet breeze; Diffuses difficult situations with ease. A Gandhi of the island.
  • Lonely Lovebird; Always seeking attention, but really quite adorable. Better loved than realizes.
  • Lord of the Pants; A Kittymorph who knows how to work it even undercover.
  • Lovable; you don't know what's so great in them, but you can't stop the fuzzy feelings.
  • Mad Scientist; Mad, I tell you! MAD!
  • Master Builder; A frequent guest at Dwelling-raisings.
  • Memento Maury; They talk about death all the time, like a fond old friend. Their collection usually contains the odd shrunken head or a few limbs from previous incarnations.
  • Metal and Glass; Exemplar of the Robot race. Initializing bonus.
  • Mezzo Expresso; Because sometimes you just need multiple languages to express something or add emphasis.
  • Midget Mush Mouth; You think chavs are a bunch of hoity-toity, stuffed-shirt wannabees, what with their refined speech and all.
  • Midget Romeo; All the women of the island want to get with you, they just don't know it yet.
  • Misnomer Mastery; A frequent word misplacer when using epithets. For them, it's an art!
  • Modern Major-General; For my military knowledge, though I'm plucky and adventury, has only been brought down to the beginning of the century; But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral, I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
  • Modest but Awesome; Refuses to acknowledge their amazing-ness.
  • Mood Lifter; Brings smiles where frowns sat before.
  • Mostly Harmless; Exemplar of the Human race. Welcome, by the way.
  • Mountain Mauler; Mountain goats watch you in awe.
  • Mutant Massacrer; The mutant magpie runs when it hears you coming through the woods.
  • Naughty but Nice; There's a heart of gold in there.
  • Naughty but Nice; Nice and naughty, just the way I like'm.
  • Non-malodorous Camelid; You are not a smelly dramallama, nor are you British. You have much to be happy about.
  • Open Mind; But not so open their brains fall out.
  • Obsessive Nitpicker; Details, details, details!
  • Overachiever; Not only did you have tea with Horatio, you managed to avoid the Improbably burny fire. Bravo!
  • Pachyderm Pandemic; If it's worth killing, it's worth over-killing. You gain such a blood lust.
  • Pinky and the Brain; "Tonight, we take over the world!"
  • Plain Plane; Flies across the savana!
  • Plain Swain; The rain in Spain falls mainly on.. other people. You zip between the drops.
  • Plasmaster; White-hot gas artiste.
  • Plotter Extraordinaire; They're twelve moves ahead already.
  • Poetical Bent; Rhymes galore, couldn't ask for more!
  • Prim Reaper; They can lay waste to the countryside, yet they're always so impeccably clean!
  • Pun Master; It's an artform, really.
  • Pungeoneer; Taking puns to new heights (or depths, depending on who you ask).
  • Punisher; Painful punnery.
  • Quagmire Creator; Gives pause to even the most loquacious of contestants.
  • Quantum Quizzler; You can bamboozle even the Cryptic Question Joker.
  • Quiet Riot; "I never touched him, officer."
  • Quietly Brilliant; Doesn't say much, but when they do, everyone listens.
  • Quintessential Joker; Before there were jokers, there was you.
  • Quintessential Joker; That's your statute in the museum.
  • Quintessential Joker; That's you in the museum.
  • Refreshingly Sane; In a place where everyone's off their rocker, they are regularly on it. And it's nice.
  • Resourceful Roleplayer; Supplied by the contents of monsters' pockets and stomachs, this contestant's motto is "waste not, want not."
  • Resourceful Repairer; Also known as the Fix-It Contestant.
  • Rocklike Endurance; You've watched them deflect bullets. WITH THEIR EYES.
  • RUM; Really Ugly Midget. The littler ones aspire to be just like you when they grow up.
  • Sammich Slayer; You better hope the sammich doesn't hear you calling yourself that.
  • Scatterbrain; Uhmm, sorry; who are you again? I'm su-oh, mom! Hey mom!
  • Scrivener Extraordinaire; Shakespeare and Chaucer should take lessons from you.
  • Sex Kittenmorph; as seen on TV!
  • Shy... In a cute way.
  • Skronky Pothead; Don't ask and we won't tell. Just like lawmaking and sausage making.
  • Snarkypants Snarkmaster; Always seems to have a retort to everything. Sly and quick with words, a true master of the English language.
  • Snow Goer; Your bow shock goes though snow like a hot knife through butter.
  • So Lonely, So; Embraced a new friend's gifting. He made friends to them, he did. Rude to refuse ignore, yes.
  • Social Pioneer; They've invented the newest craze. Twice.
  • Speedy Climber; Wait, didn't you just get here?
  • Spork Sporter; Loves the challenge of fighting with minimal weaponry.
  • Staircase Wit; Just keep climbing.
  • Stalwart Defender; At the forefront of any breach, leading the charge to repair or fight.
  • Stand-Up Comic; Always ready with wit and quips.
  • Statistic; What Statistic? Who knows. But you've got +1 of it, you smarmy little jackrabbit.
  • Steampunk Scientist; A specialist in technology that will generally ignore the next EMP blast. As a bonus, it's fashionable!
  • Storyteller; Let me tell you a story about the Island.
  • Strength of Ten; Not only will they open the stuck pickle jar, they will punch out a panthzer. With one swing.
  • Stout Fellow; "Beer is proof that God loves us, and wants us to be happy."
  • Stutter Wonder; Your lexicological slice-and-dice is a sight to behold.
  • Suave Son of a Gun; Even Seth wishes he were a charmer like you.
  • Supersonic Swimmer; Even the fish have fin envy.
  • Supple Creater; Fond of making mementos or buildings that are rather silly, or trick you into picking them up, only to laugh at the description.
  • Swedish Bikini Team Member; Not only are you hot, you also know the difference between a vulva and a Volvo.
  • Sweltering Savage Chef; Lives and breathes to cook. Everything they make is delectable.
  • Tag, I'm It!; Glories in their spot in the stocks.
  • Technical Tenacity; Practice makes perfect.
  • Titan Tickling; You have became very familiar with barnacles and they with you.
  • Titan Tormentor; Really, now, The Watcher will have to mint more Requisition if you keep this up.
  • Titanic Sinker; Titans can't swim (when they're full of holes), who knew?
  • Tough Cookie; Has teeth of steel.
  • Typo-gremlin Target; "What?! I have fat fingers" and hilarity ensues.
  • Typo-gremlin's Wrath; Your clanmates and friends love it when you join the storyline.
  • Unassuming Artist; Look! I drew you a picture! Do you like it?
  • Unintentional Wit; Oh? That was funny? I didn't mean for it to be, but okay!
  • Veteran; They've been here FOREVER.
  • Voice of Reason; A ground wire in the electrical circuits of havoc that are the Island.
  • Warm Heart; Kind, caring, willing to help, and always sympathetic.
  • War Paint; beautifully coloured names and titles.
  • Welcome Wagon; Greetings!
  • Witty Wordsmith; Parodies, puns, jokes, stories, all fall into their domain.
  • Word Wielder; Losing to one is a fate far worse than death.
  • Wordsmith; Who knew words were so malleable? You did!
  • Xat Cat; Dude, you really know how to chop logs.
  • Xenodochial Master; Very nearly the first person seen by newbs, after their implant surgery.
  • Xenophilic; One race? That's boring!
  • Yard Decorator; They make Dwellings pretty.
  • Yodeling of the Damned; Within you is the power to vanquish the mutant minstrel menace.
  • You Can Dance; Hedgehogs are your friend.
  • Zed Head; You had a personally autographed piece of Jerry Garcia's brain, it was tasty. It made you trip.. hard.
  • Zinger; Excellent timing, devastating commentary.
  • Zombie Hunter; They can smell a brain from 40 meters away.
1) I read "come all over" twice before i figured it out.
2) Oh, and that's entirely positive attributes only. If you find yourself using "but" in the description, try again. Nobody wants a present that gives with one hand and takes away with the other.
3) What, you mean like the Pinata?
4) See entry - Non-malodorous Camelid
5) A, A-bis, A-bis-a, A-bis-a,second door, ring twice
6) Contraction: (be) like the wise - don't be stupid.
7) Comma, not a coma; once again stressing don't be brain dead.
8) A fortified structure where you keep stuff - I don't know why he used this word here.
9) Second person possessive pronoun, can be singular or plural - kind of wishy washy don't you think?
10) Or less-than-traditional.
11) And he means this in the nicest way possible!
12) That's these things.
13) Are you an innie or an outie? Too personal?
14) A preposition, actually working quite closely with out in this case.
15) Definite article - it refers to a specific thing.
16) That's the other list just below this one - don't get confused!
17) Hyphen - an excellent word to use for a game of hangman.
18) Contraction of a third person plural pronoun in the year 2011.
19) Short for justice or long for us.
20) Husband - Why is he using Swedish in an English document?
21) A department not usually found in a department store.
22) Or difficult, if you prefer.
23) Don't confuse it with the number two too.
24) Shouldn't you be doing some, before your boss catches you playing on the island.
25) Another preposition - Do you get the impression that CMJ really likes prepositions?
26) Referring to CMJ, for clarication.
27) Notepad.exe
28) Don't be silly. Notepad isn't a code editor, it's a blight on the face of humanity.
29) Code word for CMJ being too busy to do it this week and deluding himself that he won't be too busy next week.
30) In this case, superfluous, overindulgent wordsmithing or fluff.
31) Full stop - keeps all the juicy goodness in the sentence.
32) But, but. . . aww, mo-om!
33) Additional Alliteration; Always Advantageous?
34) Even when they're terrible. Try to be punny.
 
Logged in as: Guest (Guest)
attributes.txt · Last modified: 2017/05/28 03:34 (external edit)