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Emily, Please Give Back My Charm
To the tune of Layla by Eric Clapton.

To marry you it was my goal,
To find my true love and move into squat hole,
But as of now I can't take it no-more,
In my plans you were the only flaw,

E-mily! I went down on one knee,
E-mily! Now please let me be free,
E-mily! Darlin' you are drainin' all my cha-arm!

Told you the ring I gave you was fake,
Told you it was my fault, not yours,
I told you I'd slept with hundreds of whores,
I just can't take no more!

E-mily! I'm down on both knees,
E-mily! I wanna divorce, please!
E-mily! Darlin' your love brings me nothing but ha-arm!

The other contestants, didn't marry you,
they were all forewarned about it,
even newbies knew, never to propose,
In my love I was a fool.

E-mily! Our marriage is in doubt,
E-mily! Thank The Three my charm ran out,
E-mily! Now that we're divorced I can get cha-arm!1)

E-mily! (Emily!)2) I'm flying solo now!
E-mily! I'm free of you, you cow!
E-mily! Darlin' I hope you come to ha-arm! 3)4)5)

(INSERT AWESOME INSTRUMENTAL)

Authored by Max Dougwell

1) Yes, I know, I used Charm and Harm twice. You try finding a rhyme that fits. Seriously, try, I want to see if there are any.
2) Backup vocals. Only point they're used in the entire song.
3) E-mily! Darlin', I hope you buy the fa-arm!
4) I suppose. . .I did ask for it. . .heh heh, cos' she's a cow.
5) Don't forget her arm.
 
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emily_please_give_back_my_charm.txt · Last modified: 2017/05/28 03:34 (external edit)