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We All Love Mister Stern...

but, he simply cannot record all of the Island's history without help, what with his leg and all. So without further ado, we present, in (hopefully) chronological order, the history of the Island you won't find in the museum.

This is a community column, so please- if you know anything about this place we so...willingly live that was missed here, add away, correct away!1)

Origins of the Island

The museum is a good source for research into this topic, but one of the things that have scholars puzzled is a manuscript from Jungle Publications. It mentions one David Abraham, and there is some debate as to the identity of this man and his relationship to Doktor Improbable. Was he, as this text suggests, the professor's lab assistant and lover? Indeed, some speculate as to whether the man even existed. Until the sources of the manuscript can be discovered and peer-reviewed, David Abraham will have to remain a contested point in the history of the Island.

The Seasons

Any successful television show has more than one season2), and Improbable Island, (depending on your perspective on string theory and the conservation of matter) is no exception. Sex, drugs, even a bit of rock n'roll, after all. With explosions and wook at the fuzzy kittehs, ooo! thrown in too, this show will simply never die.

Wibbly wobbly, timey-wimey...

and then back to Nielsen-rateable!

Races

Kittymorphs seem to be the only race with any of their history that is NOT found in Mister Stern's museum, available through much patience and Rohit the Robot, and that is less dangerous than Mutant poetry.3)

It's damned little, but this was the most vociferously demanded4) information, and as a result, I still have all my parts where they should be, and am NOT contemplating making out with my Lightning Gun, so, here you are!

Kittymorphs

The Dojo

I bet you didn't know that your Masters in the Dojo weren't always the folk you've come to know and loathe for hunting you down for skipping lessons!

The Old Masters

The Onslaught Begins

Did you know that the monsters didn't always make outpost sieges?

One transcript did not survive; it was of The Watcher telling us over the loudspeakers (the Message of the Day, in this case) that the Monsters in the jungle were going quiet, but were beginning to travel together, in larger and larger packs. Specifically around the outposts.5)

Here is the rest of the story (in chronological order):

The Watcher arrives in the Common Grounds

A War Council is convened

The Plan

Binjali searches for her lost love: Week Six shows us a rare quiet moment in this most violent portion of the war on improbability. Such moments were almost exclusively on the Failboat in those days.

Titans

Know the story of the first one?

The Titan cometh.

Things get Stranger

As many of you know, the Island itself has it out for us. In a personal way, I swear. As many of you may not know the story here- yet- I will leave it vague, and for you to ponder the Watcher's thoughts on talking to strangers as you walk the Island. You have been warned...

The Watcher on strangers

There's a Hole

One day, a hole opened in NewHome. A sinkhole? Mining? No-one yet knows why. But we do know one thing.

This time, WE declare war.

1) Please do keep it to Island history-centered stories, not purely personal ones. Please also make them stories that are neither in any of the quests, nor in the NewHome Museum.
2) Yes, browncoats. I KNOW. SHUSH.
3) ...or, say, talking to any Joker
4) By only one guy, but he looked so sad.
5) This is not entirely accurate. Intensive research in the MoTD archives has uncovered the fact that a transcript does still exist. The first hint contestants had that monsters' behaviour might be changing was a message forbidding us to repeat ugly rumours.
 
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history_mister_stern_doesn_t_know.txt · Last modified: 2014/10/15 03:44 by Trotsky