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From The Improbable Traveler's Guide to Improbable Travel, Season 1 Edition:

Technology

Internet

Widely rumored to exist, the Internet is in fact a complete myth. This hypothetical construct is believed to be the exact opposite of reality TV - whereas reality TV presents things exactly as they are1), the Internet is reported to present them exactly as they are not.2)

The Internet is commonly assumed to be the means by which contestants are first brought to the Island, but this is not accurate. Instead, contestants are brought to the Island by a series of tubes, originally developed by the scientists at Improbable Central and similarly named the 'Internets', and the similarity of the names has been the source of much confusion. Unlike the 'Internets,' no one has ever claimed to have seen the Internet, and it will not appear in the jungle and attack you. Because it does not exist,3) contestants have no need to fear the Internet.

1) Or something
2) This sort of un-reality can be distinguished from lies because . . . uhm, well, I guess it can't.
3) Unlike Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and your Great Aunt Alice. Those monsters really do exist, and they'll kick your ass in jungle fights, you poor sod.
 
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internet.txt · Last modified: 2017/05/28 03:34 (external edit)