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The S.S. Better Accomodations is a boat built to provide more comfort in the Ocean of Failure. It has engaged in Naval War with the FailBoat on occasion. The Ship is captained by Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy and navagated by jetdragon

History

<BOTS> Returning Contestant Mira Vaz despairs, "Okay... that's it. I want my own berth and room service. If I'm going to be down here this often as a zombie, I want better accomodations.1)"

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy floats in on the S.S. Better Accomodations. "Welcome to the S.S. Better Accomodations Hotel Boat. Making your stay in the Ocean of Failure mush more relaxing. Plus, Our boat isn't sinking. We have Luxury Suites open to anyone and Super-Luxury Suites for CIA and CHAOS Members. What? I like <CHAOS>. Has alot of potential. We also have a pool! But then again, if you like swimming, you should just stay on the FailSub."

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy 's Boat nearly misses an Iceberg. "Iceberg? There shoulden't be an Iceberg where we are chartered. Looks like we're at the North Pole" Sherpa checks his map.

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy announces, "Attention 'Better Accomodations' passengers. It appears that we are about 20,000 miles of course. He appologize for the inconvienience. We will be fireing the navigator."

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy glares at his Joker Navigator2). "Why did I hire you again?" "You liked my hair" "Oh yes, I remember now. Your hired!"

<SPOON> Returning Contestant Taz Of Dth stabs the Joker Navigator with his meat fork and throws him overboard "I am incapable of suffering such massive failure as that navigator exhibited, too cold here for my liking!"

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy 's Boat is sailing through a sea of Lava. "Great. Where the h*ll are we now? Seriously." He takes out his map. "Let's see, sea of fire, sea of fire..."

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy despairs, "Hmmm. Attention 'S.S. Better Accomidations' Passengers. It seems that without any kind of navigator, we have somehow sailed into the pits of hades. Swimming is not advised. As the water is now boiling."

<QQQ> Contestant jetdragon "erm King of ace high? can I work for you? I'm a great map reader! and I come here often!" gives king of ace high a pleading look.

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy despairs, "Well Jetdragon, I like your hair! We'll hire you as navigator is you can navigate us out from the bowls of Muspelhiem. I'm pretty sure that's where we are."

<QQQ> Contestant jetdragon " ok thanks! Glad to be on your boat sir! Also I've found a way out of this lava sea! turn to south and about 10 miles after that we turn east! and erm sir? were not in the bowls of Muspelhiem. were sailing in the jaws of Slaltihium..." Grabs a nearby book " which means were baicly doomed if my directions are wrong! Is your old navigaor around I'd like to kick him in the seat of his pants for the mess he's made of this!!!"

<SPOON> Returning Contestant Taz Of Dth brags "I stabbed the old navigator in the face and threw him overboard. Damnable Joker Navigators anyhow!"

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy despairs, "Jetdragon?...JETDRAGON! Where are we now? And why is it dark?"

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy hears a demonic vioce proclaim, "Dispair, mortals, for the hour of DOOOM is upon you all."

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy despairs, "Hey, whoever it is that sounds like he smokes 10 packs a day? Could you turn the lights back on?"

<SPOON> Returning Contestant Taz Of Dth shuffles back on deck grumbling about shadow dragons, midgets, evil squirrels, and voices that don't tell him what he's supposed to be looking for

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy hears a demonic vioce proclaim, "Oh, sure. Sorry"

<SPOON> Returning Contestant Taz Of Dth turns towards the sound of the voice, shines a flashlight, and promptly shoots the owner of the demonic voice in the face with an apple that, oddly enough, becomes a muzzle on contact

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy looks at his map as a Green Light begins to glow. He ponders "Why has my map transfigured into a map of Middle Earth?"

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy despairs, "Anyone else have a working map?"

<SPOON> Returning Contestant Taz Of Dth continues grumbling, adding demonic voices to his list of complaints as he momentarily consults his skull mounted glowing gem

<SPOON> Returning Contestant Taz Of Dth absently reaches into the fabric of space and hands Sherpa a handheld device capable of allowing him to view any map he wants

<SPOON> Returning Contestant Taz Of Dth returns to arguing, rather loudly, with the glowing gem in a language long since forgotten to all but a few sentient trees, apparently not getting the answer he wanted

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy is handed a map by a tenticle that emerges from the water. Reading the map he says, "Okay, so right now, we are in some place called "Styx."" Domo Arigato Mr. Roboto is heard in the distance.

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy despairs, "Attention, passengers of the S.S. Better Accomodations, We are currently being chased by a ferryman named Charon shouting "Where's my money?" Please do not be alarmed."

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy despairs, "Because he can smell fear."

<SPOON> Returning Contestant Taz Of Dth ponders a moment before slapping the gem with a salmon that conveniently appeared in his hand. Removes the muzzle from the demonic voice owner and feeds them the salmone. Muzzles the gem

<SPOON> Returning Contestant Taz Of Dth checks his DUMB device then heads to the rear of the boat. Sets the dial on the device to "SHIP" then fires an apple that conveniently becomes a cannonball directly into the other ship..

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy rams the FailBoat with the S.S. Better Accomodations. "Yay! We finally navigamated outa that place!"

<QQQ> Contestant jetdragon "erm sir? did we have to hit their boat because the've now got a pretty big cannon with a lady controling it... and she don't look happy!" the watcher fires her cannon at S.S. Better Acomadations.

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy laughs maniacally as the Watcher fires on his Ship. "FIRE THE MACHINE I BUILD WHILE I WAS DRUNK!" A Burst of Rainbow Improbability rams into the cannonball, reflecting it back at the FailBoat.

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy despairs, "Attention, passengers of the S.S. Better Accomodations, if any of you are Pirates, NOW BE THE TIME FER BOARDIN'!"

<CIA> King of AceHigh Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy throws off his Fedora and put's on a Pirate Hat, then jumps onto the FailBoat to steal everything that hasn't suffered Sinking Damage. 3)

1) Hense the name
2) Not jetdragon at this point
3) Unfortunately, by this point, everything had suffered sinking damage
 
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s.s._better_accomodations.txt · Last modified: 2017/05/28 03:35 (external edit)