These are just some ideas I've been tossing about for a while - Most of them are silly and completely crap. Enjoy and/or use them if you like... or not... The pictures are just helpful guides in what each mount is trying to somewhat represent and are indeed not the mounts themselves.
Squathole Mount -
The "Mick Truck" - 75 cigarettes
A Mack truck is a large and powerful industrial truck. The Mick Truck, based on the mack truck design, is much squattier and quite a bit uglier, but not lacking in brute horsepower. Driving around in this mount while fighting causes you to literally ram the truck into your foes, scoring your first hit, after which you'll need to jump out to attack. If possible to code, it may also allow you to score the last hit necessary to kill the monster as you climb back in and back over your foe.
Improbable Central's Mount -
The MACHINE! 200 cigarettes
A builder's, logger's, miner's, decorator's delicious wet dream. A traveler's soggy nightmare. Better than walking if you really need to get anywhere, but once you get there, a generous buff to building a site makes this baby irreplaceable. It also very randomly aids you in battle for no reason by attacking with one of its many oversized industrial grade appendages.
"The Coin" - 500 cigarettes
Each step of one's journey, the coin is flipped and you appear very quickly in the next grid. Your current form, circumstances and altitude are completely improbable... Travel costs are 1% for ALL terrain types and you have a VERY solid chance of surviving the trip. Most of the time. *Cough*
Normal effect - 30%
You flip "The Coin" high into the air. It rings and whistles through the air till it comes to a stop in your palm. As you slap it on your wrist, the world goes dark a moment and as you remove your hand you notice you are now in a new location in the direction you wanted to go! How improbably convenient.
Random effect - 15%
You flip "The Coin" high into the air. It rings and whistles through the air till it comes to a stop in your palm. As you slap it on your wrist, the world goes dark a moment and as you remove your hand, the light returns and you notice you are now in a new location in a different direction than you wanted to go! How improbably inconvenient...
Random effect - 5%
You flip "The Coin" high into the air. It rings and whistles through the air till it comes to a stop in your palm. As you slap it on your wrist, the world goes dark a moment and as you remove your hand you notice you are now completely made of delicious bacon and you are now in a new location in the direction you wanted to go! How improbably convenient... for your enemies... (Buff: 20% offense Debuff: 20% defense)
Random effect - 5%
You flip "The Coin" high into the air. It rings and whistles through the air till it comes to a stop in your palm. As you slap it on your wrist, the world goes dark a moment and as you remove your hand you notice you are now a Large Armored Tank bristling with armaments of doom and peril. You are now in a new location in the direction you wanted to go! How improbably inconvenient... for your foes!!! (Strong Buff goes towards any round of random combat occuring on the grid)
Random effect - 5%
You flip "The Coin" high into the air. It rings and whistles through the air till it comes to a stop in your palm. As you slap it on your wrist, the world goes dark a moment and as you remove your hand you notice you are now made of gelatin and in a new location in the direction you wanted to go! How improbably inconvenient. You best run from even the slightest conflict in this fragile yet jiggly form.
Nothing effect - 5%
You flip "The Coin" VERY high into the air. It rings and whistles through the air... and it keeps going. You keep staring up at the sky for a while until you just plain feel silly. Just to make sure you're not completely mad, you check your pockets and find the coin back where you first pulled it out. You have gone no where, but irreplaceable time has past, draining your stamina. How improbably inconvenient!
Very Tiring effect - 5%
You flip "The Coin" Very high into the air. It rings and whistles through the air, crackling with green energy and gets caught by a serious gust of wind... It gets swept in the direction you were attempting to go, so you do what anyone would do in this situation: run like hell after it. You follow the coin visually while dodging through the underbrush, scraping against briars, banging into trees and tripping over cleverly concealed rocks jutting out of the ground. Clearly, the world is working fully against you catching up to your coin. You propel yourself through dangerous and illogical paths, all the while following the green light of your coin that is now floating back down to the ground a good distance from where you originally launched it. You dive, throwing your full weight forward, to catch your coin, not fully considering prior that the coin would probably be just fine if it hit and bounced along the ground. Feeling completely victorious you stand up tall and hold your coin high in the air. After the glorious and heroic moment passes, you take account of your body. You've lost some health points and quite a bit of stamina. But you caught your coin, damn it, and that's what counts!
Deadly effect - 1%
You flip "The Coin" VERY high into the air. It rings and whistles through the air, growing very large, very quickly. Before you have a chance to avoid it, the coin falls back down to earth and forms a localized crater where you once stood. When you come to, you find yourself on the failboat already feeling more than a little "flatter" than usual.
Deadly effect - 1%
You flip "The Coin" VERY high into the air. It rings and whistles through the air, crackling with green lightning energy till it comes to a stop in your palm. As you move your arm to slap it on your wrist, a giant hand appears above you in the sky. Not realizing this, you slap your wrist extra hard and your world becomes dark, flat and full of pain. You awaken on the rotting wooden deck of the failboat and remind yourself to be a bit more gentle when you slap the coin on your wrist in the future.
Deadly effect - 1%
You flip "The Coin" VERY high into the air. It rings and whistles through the air till it comes to a stop in your palm. As you slap it on your wrist, the world goes dark a moment and as you remove your hand you notice you are in a new location, in the direction you wanted to go... about a mile above the surface! How improbably inconvenient. As you plummet towards the surface, your thoughts of anger and frustration quickly become thoughts of regret that you didn't choose the Budget Horse instead. You would have saved yourself 498 cigarettes and a blind date with gravity that you are pretty sure is going to end in tears. Your mad flailing descent ends just as disappointingly as you thought it was going to. When you come to, the gentle waves of the ocean and wooden boards of the Failboat welcome you back to consciousness. As per your normal fortune with blind dates, gravity has left you penniless, save for "The Coin", which you do NOT chuck overboard, no matter how much you feel like it at the moment.
Rare Awesome effect - 1%
You flip "The Coin" EXTREMELY high into the air. It rings and whistles through the air, crackling with green lightning energy and... a Dark storm appears suddenly brewing over your head, swirling about the coin. After a few random cracks of thunder and green lightning split the sky, a particularly large bolt strikes you dead in the forehead, empowering you and changing your form into... the legendary CMJ himself. You instantly win any battle on this grid and your health bar fills completely to the brim. Being now a temporary avatar of the mighty CMJ, the island deems you worthy to go where ever you please, giving you a list of places you could reach via a one-shot-teleporter. Like a complete bad ass, you catch the falling coin in your teeth, wishing a location in your heart of hearts, and find yourself instantly there in a flash. Sadly though, you are now just yourself again, but feeling the power still brimming within your Coin, there's always a chance of it happening again. Maybe next time!
Heh, love the suggestions. Especially the midget truck, that really would be great. Would also like to hear your suggestion for cyber city 404? perhaps a robot dog or a segway type thing?
Not sold on the coin at all.. 1% raises my travel costs significantly on many days, and doing the math:
There's a 15% chance I go the opposite direction I want to go, a 10% chance I lose stam, and a 3% chance I get boated. It's not uncommon I travel close to 100 squares a day, especially when cratehunting. The odds, with this, are not good at all, and 500 cigs is insane for something as useless as that thing.
As to The MACHINE!
What outposts to Scramblers come from? Could have sworn they were from IC.
The Mick Truck's kinda cool, but the combat thing would probably be limited rounds until your grille is clogged with blood or something, because getting hit by a truck probably isn't much different than getting hit by an elephant, and that's really OP.
(But oh, man. It could be like having 2 elephant guns at once holy shit)
Anything that guarantees you the first round of combat is also fairly unbalanced to begin with, because it trivializes higher rank DKs.
Maybe THE MACHINE can come from CC404? Sounds like an awesome mount! Horribly slow, painful, even, but super powerful dwelling builder! Oooo, combine that with a Builder's Brew and people would run out of work before they ran out of stamina! I can just imagine Beeps finishing every single building job on the entire island! He'd be pouring the Brew right down the fuel hatch like liquid Schwartz!
Horatio? Oh, Horatio?
Where are you, Horatio? I have some lovely tea for youuu.......
I warned ya. I didn't title this thread "greatest mount ideas evar". Just sayin.
Ah. My bad. Yes, I said IC, but meant CC404. Bad ass robotic builders mount. What kind of builder's buffs would you like on it? Something this amazing should at least come with fries...
As for getting a first hit on the higher DKs, I've been through 16 so far, so I certainly don't have a lot of experience about what makes it OP. I didn't think it would be any worse than the kittybike, except that the kittybike has a cap of 20 turns, whereas the micktruck would just have one hit per battle. I like the idea of the grill getting so caked with gore that you decide to avoid hitting anything with it for a while. Maybe 20 fights have the effect, what sounds good to you guys?
To respond to the 1% move stam cost on the coin, I've been using the kittybike for a good while and having just now bought the scrambler, I can see why you might not like the coin. The 1% stam for movement could be any number (like .1%) , but the point of using the coin to teleport between spaces was to make ALL travel over ALL terrain cost next to nothing. If travel doesn't really cost you any stam normally, but the effects are more random, then there's a both a reason to get one AND a reason to avoid just systematically hopping to every tile on the map. If the 30% doesn't sound good enough, try 50%. 1 out of 2 times you go where you want to go. 1 out of 6 or 7 times you end up going a direction you didn't choose. 1 out of 20 times you go the way you wanted, but with an unintended side effect (buff or debuff) and 1 out of 100 times you get boatmurdered in interesting ways. Its all to make travel interesting for players who just can't get enough improbability in their lives. Its like the cake or death buff, but you're traveling.
I think I read somewhere that CMJ had considered a mount that changes as you play like the budget horse. THAT is the kinda mount I'd be most interested in getting and maybe designing. Something that starts like a fat old donkey and ends up something like Ixion from FFX would be pretty epic. Or maybe a mount that uses your DK count to change into a mount worthy of your stature, with the mount over 100dks as something to be envied by all. I was kinda hoping the budget horse would do this, since its something that can really grow on and up with you. Maybe have a redeeming story for the mount after 4 or 5 changes so you don't have to go to hell anymore . In this game, story and random events actually matter more to me than just being the most epically powerful.
Oh, one thing I'd like to add - The "fall to your death" thing doesn't seem like it would work in canon. Remember, we're thrown out of aeroplanes when we start, and our fall is cushioned by the Improbability field. Which isn't to say that there aren't plenty of other ways to end up on the Failboat. Hell, the teleporting coin could just take you there.
Read the main page and the museum. Those give a pretty solid idea of that sort of thing.
Also, that's why you have the flexweave underlay.
Am I the only one who was sexually excited by the GIANT SAW THING?
... Yes...? Oh. Uhm, well, just ignore me, then.
Let's remember that players' skill levels are much, much higher than Dunbernarding's inception. It obviously doesn't account for how easy building seems to be now, but back in those days, people were working with 20-30 skill. Now, lots of us people have 70+ skill in them. 0 is 5% stam, 33 is 4%, 67 is 3%, and level 100 is 2% per action. A day with 120 stamina as a nonrobot, you can do only 12 carpentry actions at 0 skill, but 30 carpentry actions at 100 skill.
These mounts (as well as the existing ones) would do well with a leveling system. This would determine how long it would take until a mount either improved to the next level or ultimately left (with a loose random modifier to throw off predictions). Mounts like the Budget Horses would level up as they travel on easier terrain (using the EXP gains they leech from you as normal), the Meat Mount would level up with HP stolen in battle, and the Coin mount could level up accordingly to the stamina you spend traveling with it (giving less chance of a bad action as it gets more powerful, much like insults). Mounts that eventually leave will still leave, with a marginally raised chance every level they manage to gain (for example, a MMMM has a 1% chance of leaving on every New Day for each full level exceeding 25).
Not every mount has to level the same way, and it would tickle me if a trading system (between players) evolved from the concept.
You could say you would be able to sell the mount back once you think it'll reach a certain level and disappear (remember, not every mount gets any refund!), and that's simply another game gamble. You gain cigarettes from your exchange, and can buy a far less powerful but fresh mount. You choose how far you want to take it; no one can say you can't give the mount back to Mike.
So i had an idea for making the mick truck a little more fair? since i heard some people were concerned that getting a first hit every time would be imbalanced somehow, perhaps make it so (for example) the truck had a 70% chance of scoring the first hit, 20% chance of just rolling past them doing nothing, 5% chance of getting a very powerful (near lethal) first hit, and 5% chance of slamming into a tree and injuring you instead. I think that would be an acceptable level of risk/reward right?
And perhaps after a full day of fighting, when the grill was caked with assorted gore, you could have the option of scraping it clean and keeping whatever shreds and scraps of meat you could salvage?
Ah. Well yeah i suppose it could be a problem. but maybe just blind them with the headlights until the battery dies? could still work.
I have two truly awful mount suggestions.
Don't know which place they're from, but they're both to be in the same place. Also, I am horrible with writing consistent, believable accents.
There's a fish tank about 3 meters long in the middle of the garage. It's fully transparent and has those multicolored fake rocks at the bottom of it, with fake plants and real shells strewn amongst the artificial environment. And inside the tank, taking up nearly all the room, is a dolphin.
"Ugh, god, why do you have a dolphin in this fish tank?"
"Oh, uh, well, it's a ride. I'm sellin' it."
"As a mount to travel on? What kind of sick person would do that?"
"Well, 'ey. Sure, dolphins are ugly parasitic beasts that aren't worth the shit outta a dolphin's ass and would be better off all murdered in some sort of giant saw machine, but we're at least putting the goddamn mongrels in their place as something that goes underneath our derrieres."
"...that's a fair point, but are these disgusting brutes at all any good for traveling?"
"Well, yus and no. Obviously, it can't really do much on land, so you'll have to lug its lazy ass around in your arms if you can stomach the gross feeling or maybe you can wheel it on a skateboard or something, it might tire you out a bit to do that. But in the ocean and rivers and lakes and shite, lemme tell you, nuthin' travels faster. You'll probably be movin' faster on a slimy dolphin in the water than riding over grass on a Kittybike."
"But, I'm not going to visit Dolphinland or some other aquatic horrorhouses, I use my mount to travel to actually worthwhile places."
"Y'might want to try thinking outside the box. Replan yer routes based on ocean connections and shite. Try it out, friend, it's only 35 cigs."
"35 cigs to sell me a barely-upgraded booger? You're shitting me. I'll have to put up with its horrible screeches and atrocious smell and grimy skin, and you're gonna charge me more than a Zombie Donkey?"
"Alright, fine, 30 cigs and we'll throw in a saddle and gloves so you don't gotta touch it."
"Earplugs and a facemask too, buddy."
You approach a large fish tank. White feathers are scrunched up against the side, bubbles of air collecting under them. The plastic plants sway in the water current as you hear the whimpers of the majestic beast in front of you.
"I'm proud to present t'ya the Pegasus Dolphin! I was unsure if I should call it that, 'cause really, what's to say that if something's like a pegasus, it's got wings. A pegasus has hooves, a mane, a brushtail, stomachs, teeth. Why do we always gotta say it fo' wings? We do it birds too! Maybe it just has a beak, or hollowed bones with bracing inside instead o' solid bones! Maybe it's not wings for once, maybe it's--"
"How much for this beautiful thing?" You stare at the silvery-blue skin glimmering faintly as the ripples in the water distort the light hitting her. Her angelic wings are much too large for her to spread out in such a cramped, confined container. The poor soul, you must save her from this dreadful life.
"Oh! Right. Selling things to the customer. Uh, it's about a hundred cigs, a damn good bargain. But I warn ye, it's not going to be only that. She got a bad addiction, y'know. You gotta feed her a cig every single day to get her flappin' into the air. When she's flying, it don't matter where you go, s'always the same amount o' effort. Otherwise, she's no better than a common dolphin."
Entranced by the divine glow of this creature's face... those warm black eyes, that marvelous snout, that perfect shape... you nod absently to everything Mike says. The Pegasus Dolphin needs you in her life! You must buy this unearthly treat to the world!
Heh. I like em.
Especially the flying dolphin. Its got a lot of potential as pretty much the best mount in the game. Also strikes a hitchhiker vein which is bloody awesome. Yes, I went there.
I like the fact its a mount with a daily cost and I could literally do just fine with a mount that allows me to tour the entire island's worth of dwellings. Traveling still needs to be something in game though, or otherwise you take the journey away from the destination.
Of course, if you're going to go the distance and truly create a mount above all other mounts, it has to be able to compete with the rocket snail:
Leaves? Where we're going we don't need... leaves...
I guess I should have known there'd already be pictures of winged dolphins on the internet.
Well... I don't know why anyone would attempt to move lumber/stone by hand... I haven't done that since my first time when I didn't know about material stocks! And yeah, masonry would be very annoying to level, decorating you could just use a wall of text. And, cookie exploit?
I suppose this is a fine place for me to dump some mount ideas I've been holding on to for a while.
The Writing Desk
The Raven Inn is a curiosity that quickly loses its appeal and becomes an annoyance to be swatted away from one's face when one jungles. Why not decrease the chance to encounter the Raven Inn to 0, and just make a mount that lets you find it in the Jungle, like Budget Horse used to do? Put this mount in NewHome so that Rooks don't pick a better mount first and never see the Raven Inn. If the Raven Inn ever becomes worthwhile again, then increase the encounter chance back up to whatever it is now.
The Chariot of Sharks
As everyone knows, the next canon race on the Island will be sharks. I'd like to be carried around in style by a chariot pulled by sharks. They would work quite like Fred's dolphin idea, but faster, pricier, and with a mean attack buff when in the ocean.
Gives a really good travel buff over water, for only 50 req! Lasts until NewDay, when it either disintegrates from use or is taken to wrap fish. It's a newspaper folded into the shape of a boat.
 They are replacing Zombies, because Zombies are passé unstoppable masticating killing machines nowadays.
 citation needed
I'd always felt Swamp Squat Hole should have a Boat Mount.
It'd - of course - make travelling on water easier.
Swamp and Snow would be neutral, because you could use it sleigh-like and lug along your luggage easier.
All other terrains would be harder, because you'd have to carry the stupid thing.
It'd help in fighting because you can use it as a shield and clonk it over our enemies head.
And it'd be a disappearing mount, shoddy Squat Hole product that it is.
It'll sink after so many rounds of water travel or/and after taking too much damage in a fight.
PS: Nothing against Raven Inn. I often win Req at the Sixed Dice Game.
Maybe the Hunter's Lodge could sell a Lucky Charm that wards off the Inn for those that don't want it
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