I really like the monster rating system, but I think it is really lacking a potentially helpful element:

An option to write why you gave it that rating.

Sure, seeing the bulk average rating of a monster is enough to give a general idea if it is good or bad, but wouldn't it be handy to see what makes it good or bad? or if there is a general consensus on what is good or bad about specific monsters?

I figure that'd be a lot of work to sort through, if everyone started writing why they like certain monsters. And it'd kind of leave out anyone who has already rated every monster, since you cant re-rate.

So maybe we can discuss our favorite and least favorite monsters here!

I am curious, what is everyone's favorite and least favorite monsters and why?


My favorite monsters are the ones that take amusing twists on everyday situations, like Sinus Headache and Your Own Tongue. I also like game-related monsters like Cryptic Questions Joker and Crafty Joker.

My all-time favorite monsters, however, are That Guy, Unlucky Bastard, Reluctant Cannibal, Religious Zombie, and Vegan Zombie.

I like them because each one is an entirely plausible reaction to island living. I think they are really hilarious. I find them funny every time I read them, and have no trouble visualizing them, which is something I appreciate.

I suppose my least favorite monsters are the super hero type guys, like Uranium Man. I don't really find them to be funny, nor do I even enjoy killing them. All-around I give them a "Meh"

I am also not very fond of the Zombie line of things (excluding the two named above). Zombie Puppy, Zombie Cat, Zombie Worm... by the time you get to Zombie Goat and Zombified Luciano Pavorotti you are pretty bored with zombies. It's overkill, really.

The Midget stuff is funny, because each instance it is different, and funny. Really funny. Particularly the Dwarf one. Hee heee "I'm not happy" "Then which one are you?" Hee hee heee.

Also, spoons. I am tired of spoons. So many things about missing spoons. And that dude shouting about spoons. I dunno, may just be me, but I don't like spoons.

But yeah, those are my thoughts!

This is a great topic for discussion. I think my all-time favorite monsters are the ones that connect to each other,.

Like This Guy, who shows up twice, once at level 1 as a snuffling newbie who drops a lot of cigs, and once at level 16 with a chainsaw and a lust for revenge. (That Guy may or may not be the same guy.) The Little Old Lady, and Albert. Your Future Self (very funny!) and then Your Past Self. The Insurance Salesman, in a panic about the, uh, meat culture here on the Island, and then the Reluctant Cannibal who shows up later wielding roast leg of Insurance Salesman. (Okay... so on that last one I'm biased.)

I have a soft spot in my heart for Potato Newscaster, who makes no sense at all except for that lovely pun when you beat him.

Of the three malfunctioning appliances at level 1, I like the little red Rice Cooker the best because it bounces on its stubby little legs. Who can resist a bouncing rice cooker? Also, it's a great source of cooked rice! -- just as the Poultrygeist is an unending supply of fresh eggs.

Most, if not all, of the SPOON monsters are sly references to a clan that was quite strong in S1 but was not carried over to S2: 'There is no spoon.' (I was a member, and I led the clan for a good while -- but even I don't get the one about blue spandex.)

What do I like?
Well I agree on all the Midget meetings, they're each one of them hilarious. Some of them are based on pop culture references, but you don't need to know this to appreciate them. I'd been enjoying the Midget plumber for some while before I realised where he came from.

My personal favourate however is the Evil Orc. The irony is so well done, right down to taking his milk afterwards. The orc's evily trying to look after his family, whilst you're on the side of good because you're going round slaughtering everything in sight. Anyone with a grain of self awareness, would have to look at themselves here. So, top marks there.

I'm afraid I don't like sinus headache and your own tongue, it just seems too ridiculous attacking these things with a spork or a stick with nail or whatever you have. I'll look more kindly on them knowing that someone else really likes them.

The average zombie ones, well, they are things you'd meet in the jungle, but unless they have an amusing write up (and I'd include Pavarotti with the vegan and religous zombies there) then they're mediocre really. Pull out 'My first big book of animals' and apply zombie in front of each.

Bonus points to Robert Catesby and Mongol Hordette for teaching me something I didn't previously know, but that wouldn't count for too much if they didn't both have good write ups to go with them.

Some, like Oxford the perverted tabby, I quite like the idea, but that's all it is. It needs to be fleshed out with a write up to make it properly good.

Um, that's all I can think of off hand. I may post again later.

Blue spandex? SPOON???


I personally like the more amusing references (Midget with Fungal Infection), as well as the in-jokes (That Guy, This Guy, Albert, Granny, Future/Past self, etc.)

Then again, I have a strange sense of humor (Feels right like home on II...)

The ones I don't like are mostly the ones without a writeup...except the Potato Newscaster...just a common 'tater...
My love of awesome puns shines through.

I love the Orc! So wrong, it's right! There's something about the twisted cruelty that makes me cackle, same with the whole Budget Horse story (Feral Budget Horse... also a thumbs up.)

Anything that repeats in different forms (This/That Guy, Albert, Past/Future Self, &tc) is fun, and I also like in-game callbacks (Dan, Work Experience Lads, FBH as above).

I like Zombie Puppy and Kitten if only for the perfect level of gore in the description, juxtaposed with cuteness. The other zombies are lacking in that cognitive dissonance, so I don't find them quite as much fun.

Gordon the Cheese Eater also knocked me out (!) the first time I bumped into him.

Ooh, good topic!

Creatures I love to hate:
The Lolrus (Grrrrr)
The Blonde heiress (GRRRR)
and Vegan and Religious Zombies - so sad, I just want to put them out of their misery!

Also veteran player and this guy. All of them just make me want to hit so hard.

The Orc of course, and the monsters that connect to each other, or to Island NPC's. I do enjoy the occasional pop culture references, e.g. Mel Gibson and his Racial Slurs. And the mathy and sciency monsters, such as Mobius Strip, Infinite Loop, and of course the dread Foot-Activated First-Class Lever.

But my favorite has to be the Someone with Caterpillars in their Vagina. With their Snazzy Dance Moves. WTF?

I like how it's "their" rather than "her". Even though "they" have a vagina.

Is this just random perversion? Or is there more of a story behind it?

that reminds me, didn't the Priest With a Codpiece Full Of Live Frogs come with a choir boy with an odd rash on his bottom at one point?

I agree with everybody that the Orc I find consistently funny. He's my favorite!

I also always enjoy Typo Gremlin, Three Droogs, Generic Monster, and Concerned Parent. I'm honestly surprised no one has mentioned those! I just think they're clever.

Others that nobody's mentioned yet that have sometimes amused me: Professional Romance Writer, Atinlay Igpay, Sock Puppet, David Attenborough, That Cutie, Gothic Romantic Heroine, Interrupting Cow.

Monsters I would be thrilled to see disappear, because they annoy me every time I see them: Möbius Strip, Mathematician, Math Textbook, Bicyclops, Typical Squaresoft, Green Knight, The Tick (aka Delusional Blue-Spandex), Flying Spaghetti Monster, Midget Plumber, Cereal Killer, Rind Flayer, Bert and Ernie, Goddamn Aye-Aye, Anthropomorphized Circular Saw, and all the Spoon references. Most of them just don't make any sense at all. Also all the monsters with no descriptions.

Most monsters not on the above list I am indifferent to. There are a few that we refer to a lot in game so that I'd hate to see them disappear (e.g. Panthzer) but whose descriptions don't do much for me.

I like the Panthzer quite a bit. I also like nonsensical ones, though I am particularly unenthusiastic about the arbitrary "zombie thing" enemies that show up without much of a reason for funny other than "oh, it's undead". I like Zombified Luciano Pavarotti and Vegan Zombie, but I dunno about the rest of the zombies.

Tom Cruise and Mel Gibson bore me. Anyone can make pop culture references. Anyone can go "hurr hurr Scientology" and whatnot. Moreover, we hear those kind of jokes all the time in other places. I like the jokes that I only get here on IIsland.

I like puns and wordplay, as with Poultrygeist. I like self-aware jokes about killing everything you come across for no good reason—e.g., Pacifist, Evil Orc. I like most of the riffs on Midgets that end up being really demented takes on classic game characters. As you would expect from a member of , I greatly appreciate math- and science-related humor, such as the Maxwell's Demon that I met today on the Failboat (I assume this is a recent suggestion as I haven't seen it before).

I'm not particularly fond of malfunctioning appliances. The concept is okay, but the joke needs to be continued beyond the concept, more fleshed out, in my opinion; otherwise I'm reading through a description that just confirms, yup, this is an appliance and it's broken and trying to kill me.

I love the reference to The Tick. But I also love The Tick, so YMMV.

On a more self-serving note, I'm very interested to know what people think of the monsters I've created. Anyone come across Unhelpful Signpost or Dirty Chippy yet?

i would be very sad is see the old descriptionless classics, such as the undead dreaming catfish god, dissapear or even get a description. I feel like it's an old treasure that's allways been there. And it adds some mystery to the whole thing not having half a page(or more) to get to know everything you face.
Infact, i would like to see more monsters without description. Maybe only because everyone else want elaborate texts with their fights. Don't get me wrong, i do enjoy the reading and promptly make sure i've read all the descriptions, but it's nice with a break..

Also little old lady + albert is def. the best monsters.

Bakemaster, haven't come across either of those just yet, can't help you there I'm afraid.

Yes, David Attenborough and Gothic Romantic Heroine tickle me as well (even if GRH has you surprised at the moon being out in the daytime...) Generic Monster!! Great, starts off with a completely cliched description (Indescribableable monster with a muffled roar...) then turns it completely on it's head. Love it.

I'm afraid I don't like the mathematician. That's because I'm a mathematician myself, and I can't imagine anyone I know behaving remotely like that. Has anyone ever looked round at real life? It frankly doesn't make any more sense than improbable Island, it's just different. Everyone's still a raging lunatic though. Still great fun though.

Concerned Parent, lovely write up. Particularly like the reference to watching you 'ripped apart that monster with your bare hands, and all that swearing! My!' and then you get all proud about it, only to be hit by rejection.

As for the descriptionless monsters... for me they fall into two groups. There are the ones where just the name and weapon and/or maybe the win message are enough to create a funny or surreal monster: The Undead Dreaming Catfish God is a good example of that, or Someone with Caterpillars in Their Vagina, or Dada the Ambulatory Printing Press, or the Over-full Bookcase, or the Blair Hippo, maybe even Great-Aunt Alice. (And Potato Newscaster!)

But then there are the boring ones: Death. Devil. Father Time. Vampire Bat-Prince. Vigilante. Thing in the Attic. Broadway Extra. 80's Glam Rocker. Bluebird of Happiness. Zealous Photographer. Three-Toed Sloth. Strict Non-Smoker. The ones that try for surrealism and don't quite make it: Rabid Suburban Squirrel Hive. The pop culture references that can't sustain a monster all by themselves: Gary Larson. Mel Gibson.

Not saying I want all of the latter to go away. I don't mind running into the Zealous Photographer, he just doesn't do anything to make the game better.

I like the monsters that make you actually think what it might look like. Spiderkitty, The Pizza that Time forgot, Gazebo(duuuuuhhh.), that Cutie from Work, Anime creature, Panthzer. Stuff that lets your image of them run wild. How does a Gazebo have Gnashing Teeth? Does the Anime Creature have any eyes? Is the Spiderkitty a calico?

Because of that, some monsters seem a little bland because there's no room for any imagination. Mel Gibson, Grunting Piggy, Gary Larson (I'm one of the few people that found him funny), Three French Hens. Meaty or not, everyone probably has the exact same image of them when fighting in the Jungle.

My favourite monsters are those who allow insight into the canon mindset of the character - usually, they're rather disturbing as well: Diplomat, Orc are top for idea and execution, That Goddamn Aye-Aye, Past & Future Self, Thin Air also find shelter here.

The rest: the Midgets are mostly rather funny, Little Old Lady & Albert, Cattywampus, Your Own Tongue & Pebble, The Pope all for the unexpected twists. The Lemming, Gestalt Treebranch and David Attenborough, even if they're predictable, are favourites as well. The Spiderkitty and Dada The Four-Clawed Lobster for being the role models of improbable monsters (they're happily disturbing AND hilarious!), Living Nightmare Tigershark Goddess for making a surreal monster both more surreal yet slightly more rational.

I am, however, not particularly fond of most things noted in the Completely Rational Monster (which however is a good one): Mainly references, if they can't sustain themselves. "How would that read if I didn't know X", is too often a question that absolutely destroys a monster for me - along with that the time taken for writing the encounter could as well have been spent coming up with something original. The latter also goes for many of the Island references... (especially since a couple of them describe elements no longer in place) and the multiple takes on Zombie Something. (And don't you DARE writing up Zombified Arbitrary Something. It's funny once. Maybe.)

Puns. I *like* puns, including horrible ones. They're funny the first time reading, maybe the fifth time. But, again, they usually can't really stand on their own, the Play On Words is a wonderful exception... but Word On Plays ruins it for me.

The fourth wall should be left in peace, just like most off-canon references. (KFZ! Conservative Party Member!)

Of course, there are many good and awful things left unmentioned here, just ask. As for the Dirty Chippy, since asked: Hmmn. It's sort of stereotypical with a slightly improbable take on it, with a good pun to round it off: Nothing special, but I'd say, definitively above average, 3.5/5 once the novelty wears off.

I have to say, I have always enjoyed beating the heck out of Kirkegaard.