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 Truly Bad Ideas for Mounts
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tehdave
 Wednesday, May 18 2011 @ 02:32 PM UTC  
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Quote by: Raleigh

So i had an idea for making the mick truck a little more fair[...]and 5% chance of slamming into a tree and injuring you instead. I think that would be an acceptable level of risk/reward right?



The problem with that is a similar problem as Dizzy pointed out with the coin:

At some point in your IIsland career, you can go through 50-100 fights in a day. A 1/20 chance of getting hurt first hit would either have to be negligible damage or the mount really wouldn't be worth it. Unless the truck only had so many fights it does it on (like the KittyBike). If that were the case then, it wouldn't be as worthwhile an investment (from a combat standpoint) as the Zombie donk


Isn't sanity just a one-trick pony anyway? All you get is one trick: rational thinking. But when you're good and crazy, oooh, oooh, the sky's the limit.
 
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Raleigh
 Wednesday, May 18 2011 @ 08:05 PM UTC  
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Ah. Well yeah i suppose it could be a problem. but maybe just blind them with the headlights until the battery dies? could still work.


Neko-desu!
 
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Awesome Fred
 Wednesday, May 18 2011 @ 10:31 PM UTC  
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I have two truly awful mount suggestions.
Don't know which place they're from, but they're both to be in the same place. Also, I am horrible with writing consistent, believable accents.

==============================================

There's a fish tank about 3 meters long in the middle of the garage. It's fully transparent and has those multicolored fake rocks at the bottom of it, with fake plants and real shells strewn amongst the artificial environment. And inside the tank, taking up nearly all the room, is a dolphin.

"Ugh, god, why do you have a dolphin in this fish tank?"

"Oh, uh, well, it's a ride. I'm sellin' it."

"As a mount to travel on? What kind of sick person would do that?"

"Well, 'ey. Sure, dolphins are ugly parasitic beasts that aren't worth the shit outta a dolphin's ass and would be better off all murdered in some sort of giant saw machine, but we're at least putting the goddamn mongrels in their place as something that goes underneath our derrieres."

"...that's a fair point, but are these disgusting brutes at all any good for traveling?"

"Well, yus and no. Obviously, it can't really do much on land, so you'll have to lug its lazy ass around in your arms if you can stomach the gross feeling or maybe you can wheel it on a skateboard or something, it might tire you out a bit to do that. But in the ocean and rivers and lakes and shite, lemme tell you, nuthin' travels faster. You'll probably be movin' faster on a slimy dolphin in the water than riding over grass on a Kittybike."

"But, I'm not going to visit Dolphinland or some other aquatic horrorhouses, I use my mount to travel to actually worthwhile places."

"Y'might want to try thinking outside the box. Replan yer routes based on ocean connections and shite. Try it out, friend, it's only 35 cigs."

"35 cigs to sell me a barely-upgraded booger? You're shitting me. I'll have to put up with its horrible screeches and atrocious smell and grimy skin, and you're gonna charge me more than a Zombie Donkey?"

"Alright, fine, 30 cigs and we'll throw in a saddle and gloves so you don't gotta touch it."

"Earplugs and a facemask too, buddy."

=============================================

You approach a large fish tank. White feathers are scrunched up against the side, bubbles of air collecting under them. The plastic plants sway in the water current as you hear the whimpers of the majestic beast in front of you.

"I'm proud to present t'ya the Pegasus Dolphin! I was unsure if I should call it that, 'cause really, what's to say that if something's like a pegasus, it's got wings. A pegasus has hooves, a mane, a brushtail, stomachs, teeth. Why do we always gotta say it fo' wings? We do it birds too! Maybe it just has a beak, or hollowed bones with bracing inside instead o' solid bones! Maybe it's not wings for once, maybe it's--"

"How much for this beautiful thing?" You stare at the silvery-blue skin glimmering faintly as the ripples in the water distort the light hitting her. Her angelic wings are much too large for her to spread out in such a cramped, confined container. The poor soul, you must save her from this dreadful life.

"Oh! Right. Selling things to the customer. Uh, it's about a hundred cigs, a damn good bargain. But I warn ye, it's not going to be only that. She got a bad addiction, y'know. You gotta feed her a cig every single day to get her flappin' into the air. When she's flying, it don't matter where you go, s'always the same amount o' effort. Otherwise, she's no better than a common dolphin."

Entranced by the divine glow of this creature's face... those warm black eyes, that marvelous snout, that perfect †shape... you nod absently to everything Mike says. The Pegasus Dolphin needs you in her life! You must buy this unearthly treat to the world!


 
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Darkmoon
 Thursday, May 19 2011 @ 04:09 AM UTC  
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Heh. I like em.

Especially the flying dolphin. Its got a lot of potential as pretty much the best mount in the game. Also strikes a hitchhiker vein which is bloody awesome. Yes, I went there.
I like the fact its a mount with a daily cost and I could literally do just fine with a mount that allows me to tour the entire island's worth of dwellings. Traveling still needs to be something in game though, or otherwise you take the journey away from the destination.

[url]



Of course, if you're going to go the distance and truly create a mount above all other mounts, it has to be able to compete with the rocket snail:





Leaves? Where we're going we don't need... leaves...


 
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Awesome Fred
 Thursday, May 19 2011 @ 04:34 AM UTC  
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I guess I should have known there'd already be pictures of winged dolphins on the internet. Laughing Out Loud


 
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Suffuri
 Thursday, May 19 2011 @ 04:17 PM UTC  
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Well... I don't know why anyone would attempt to move lumber/stone by hand... I haven't done that since my first time when I didn't know about material stocks! And yeah, masonry would be very annoying to level, decorating you could just use a wall of text. And, cookie exploit?


 
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Raleigh
 Friday, May 27 2011 @ 10:58 AM UTC  
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Quote by: tehdave

Quote by: Raleigh

So i had an idea for making the mick truck a little more fair[...]and 5% chance of slamming into a tree and injuring you instead. I think that would be an acceptable level of risk/reward right?



The problem with that is a similar problem as Dizzy pointed out with the coin:

At some point in your IIsland career, you can go through 50-100 fights in a day. A 1/20 chance of getting hurt first hit would either have to be negligible damage or the mount really wouldn't be worth it. Unless the truck only had so many fights it does it on (like the KittyBike). If that were the case then, it wouldn't be as worthwhile an investment (from a combat standpoint) as the Zombie donk




very true. and thats pretty much exactly where i was going with that. So that it would only be a minor disadvantage in the beginning of a fight, (because after all, trucks are equipped with airbags and seatbelts right?) rather than some failboat-worthy cataclysmic disaster. So its normal hit and the recoil injury would be the same smallish amount of damage, but then the"critical" hit against the foe would be fairly heavy. (as much as 50-75% of their health gone?)


Neko-desu!
 
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Full Metal Lion
 Monday, December 12 2016 @ 03:37 PM UTC  
Forum Improbable Badass
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I suppose this is a fine place for me to dump some mount ideas I've been holding on to for a while.

The Writing Desk
The Raven Inn is a curiosity that quickly loses its appeal and becomes an annoyance to be swatted away from one's face when one jungles. Why not decrease the chance to encounter the Raven Inn to 0, and just make a mount that lets you find it in the Jungle, like Budget Horse used to do? Put this mount in NewHome so that Rooks don't pick a better mount first and never see the Raven Inn. If the Raven Inn ever becomes worthwhile again, then increase the encounter chance back up to whatever it is now.

The Chariot of Sharks
As everyone knows, the next canon race on the Island will be sharks.[1][2] I'd like to be carried around in style by a chariot pulled by sharks. They would work quite like Fred's dolphin idea, but faster, pricier, and with a mean attack buff when in the ocean.

Disposable Boat
Gives a really good travel buff over water, for only 50 req! Lasts until NewDay, when it either disintegrates from use or is taken to wrap fish. It's a newspaper folded into the shape of a boat.

----
[1] They are replacing Zombies, because Zombies are passť unstoppable masticating killing machines nowadays.
[2] citation needed


 
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Widdershins
 Tuesday, December 13 2016 @ 10:16 PM UTC  
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I'd always felt Swamp Squat Hole should have a Boat Mount.

It'd - of course - make travelling on water easier.
Swamp and Snow would be neutral, because you could use it sleigh-like and lug along your luggage easier.
All other terrains would be harder, because you'd have to carry the stupid thing.

It'd help in fighting because you can use it as a shield and clonk it over our enemies head.

And it'd be a disappearing mount, shoddy Squat Hole product that it is.
It'll sink after so many rounds of water travel or/and after taking too much damage in a fight.


PS: Nothing against Raven Inn. I often win Req at the Sixed Dice Game.
Maybe the Hunter's Lodge could sell a Lucky Charm that wards off the Inn for those that don't want it Mr. Green


 
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