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The Central Improbable Agency is a clandestine and completely legal government agency that is listed as a clan on the Island. But is it? Though based on the Island, the CIA most definitely does not have its training facilities in the bowels of Mount Everest. It was founded by Kakuzu (or was it?) until his mysterious disappearance. The CIA's second ruler, the Hobo King of Toilettown, also strangely disappeared, never to be seen again, leaving the reins to Snickerer, who appointed Copper Wire and PotatoPancakes as leaders to assist. Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy was also appointed because of the faint smell of nostalgia that surrounded him1), and it stayed like this until something NOTHING HAPPENED. Snickerer and Pancakes left from Amnesia/ADD2), and Copper Wire has not been seen, so the agency is currently led by Sherpa Mountain Goat Guy, who claims to be the ruler of AceHigh3). The CIA only reveals half-truths and will not confirm anything. Or will they?4)

The Soothsayer, a perpetrator of lies, is one of its top enemies and should not be trusted.5)

The CIA has nothing to do with any rumors of a Plan, or multiple Plans, or experiments with Improbability. Not in the slightest.

When questioned during recent investigations into the Agencies' Activities and involvement in some strange activities, involving several improbably large Chains around the island6), all CIA members responded with 'We're sorry but at this time these rumors can be neither confirmed nor denied' 7)

1) Is that what that was?
2) respectively.
3) For some reason, when asked about this, Jokers generally start laughing too hard to give any intelligible answers
4) This assertion is, indeed, unconfirmed.
5) Besides, does anyone really know what a 'soothsayer' is or does? I mean, really, this could be your Great Aunt Alice for all you know - and you shouldn't trust her either, especially since she will sometimes appear in jungle fights and kick your ass.
6) rumored to be related to an attempt to pull the Failboat inland
7) At this time this information can be neither confirmed nor denied
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cia.txt · Last modified: 2017/05/28 03:34 (external edit)