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Dear Jesse,

What on earth is this nonsense? I finally gave up and watched a few episodes of this - show - so that you'd stop pestering me, and what do I see? Our brother, running around like a lunatic after a vampire on a motorcycle! And it seems this sort of behavior is normal!

And when did [REDACTED] start caring about his clothing? I swear he had one pair of jeans throughout all of high school. You could tell from the paint stains.

Well. It seems he's gotten over that little escapade and has been throwing himself into his work. Which is far more practical. He's worked on dwellings all over the island, and you can tell his skills are improving. That tavern is nothing like that ramshackle booth. Very fine work indeed. He could have a nice business when he comes home.

Though the way he's been acting around one of his clanmates, I don't think he'll be leaving the island anytime soon. I can't see anything wrong with her. She stuck with him throughout that silly Dracula thing, so she obviously sees something in him. Hopefully he's more sensible now. He seems to be.

Now will you leave me alone?


Dear Aaron,

So. Our brother is still an idiot. It's the Lilly incident all over again. He's broken things off with his wife. He decided he'd rushed into things, or something like that. Guess he didn't stop to realize he was rushing out of it, too.

Other than that (I know, it's a big that), he seems well. He's been running all over the island, collecting badges (of some sort). He's also attended several parties. Lucky jerk has a better social life than I do.

You really should watch. You might finally be able to snag his brownie recipe.


Dear Aaron,

I saw [REDACTED] last night! He's on Improbable Island! I know you don't watch, but maybe you should. He's calling himself Tyr Wayland, but it's definitely him: same messy hair, same grey eyes, same grin. He's got a new, ugly looking scar down the left side of his face, though. He must have tangled with something nasty. We should have know something was up when he didn't call on Mom's birthday, but I just thought he was busy with a show; tech week, or something.

And get this: he's married! Nice girl, very pretty, named Silcatra. Guess it's a good thing he and Lilly broke up. She seems pretty talented, too: she knit him a blue sweater that he wears all the time.

He spends a lot of time on the Failboat (that's where contestants go when they get beaten up). No surprise, huh? He seems to be getting better at the whole monster-fighting thing, though. Anyway, he set up a booth on the Boat, I guess to pass the time. He makes cocoa and tea, and gives it to the other contestants. That's our [REDACTED], all right. Always taking care of everyone.

He's kept up with his building, too. He made that booth, he built a house (nice spot, north of Pleasantville (it's a town in the middle of the island), and he built a store for two other contestants. His payment for that job was a wallaby1), so he's not any more fiscally responsible. Or any less silly. So far, nothing's collapsed, so maybe he's gotten better at that, too (just kidding!)

He's been wearing a DICE badge lately, so I guess he's fallen in with that bunch of jokers (no pun intended).

I'd say we should try to rescue him, but he seems perfectly happy. Maybe he'll get a pass for Christmas, or something. Until then, I'll be recording every episode. Just in case. For blackmail material.


1) her name is Finn. She breathes fire. Maybe we should be glad he's stuck on that island.
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