Don't worry your head Hairy Mary. I have problems playing jokers and robots too, it's just because of who I am, and possibly the large amount of first hand experience with and years of... Accrued distaste fro the real chavs and neds of the world, having grown up in scotland, that prevents me from playing something that is completely against who I am, but that's my short-fallings as a roleplayer and why I will probably never win in a category in the British student nationals of Roleplaying, wargaming, board gaming and collectable card games, my range of characters is very limited because of whom I am.

:EDIT: Yes the, somehow the British managed to find a way to make roleplay competitive

Grey, methinks you worry overmuch. More than a few of us roleplay by way of self-insertion, and not much else (quickly points at the shifty-looking fella in that mirror ove rthere).

As for main topic- I'm in FML's boat; the more time passes, the more "Squats" just feels like them, as well as feels... well, Island-y.

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"Ain't nothin' left to do but smile, smile, smile." -The Grateful Dead

...that is brilliant on so many levels, and I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY.

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I will always - *always* - believe in Sherlock Holmes. :still waiting for Season 3*: * by which I mean THE OTHER Season 3

Why not just call em Bastards?

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For rent: one skull, in serious need of dusting.

Because they already are? As in;

Thieving Midget Bastards!

I've been rolling this name change thing around a bit and I quite like Squats;

Thieving Squat Bastards!

Doesn't roll ff the tongue quite so nicely as 'Midget' but I reckon it works.

~Mak

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It's not an optical illusion. It just looks like one.

Seeing as Midgets and Jokers are the two races unique to II, what if we continue the card allusions and name them Knaves? It accurately describes them as unsavoury and comes with its own adjectival version (foetid Knavish brothels).

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For rent: one skull, in serious need of dusting.

Soooooo...

I don't know if some of the ideas in this article might pertain to our Midgets or Squats or whatever we might be calling them... but you guys are just the sort of nerds who I think would appreciate this article that I just found on goblins (which I think have some fundamental similarities to Midgets in II, though clearly different).

http://www.maxgladstone.com/2014/10/goblins-the-fungal-body-politic/

moo

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moooooooooo Visit and help me finish the monster list: goo.gl/rpBGe (Ya'll mostly know me as CLOG, fyi)

So, I'm a little late in the conversation, and it seems that Squat has taken some traction already, but I have a suggestion of my own. I was reading about these Scottish feys called Fachens. Ornery little buggers that look like someone threw up an omelette on their face and burned it there. Sure, they have only one leg and one eye, but with a name like that, depending on how you decide to pronounce it, it really fits our own ornery little bastards.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fachen

For some reason this really appeals to me. Don't know why but it does. It also has the advantage of coming with a complete set of physical characteristics which make them not little humans.

Since reading post #1 (and the subsequent SO MANY POSTS AFTER), I've been thinking a great name, albeit long, would be: Squat Bastards.

Also, since Squats and Bastards have been suggested, maybe it's even a better idea than I thought. The two-word thing does detract from it a bit, though.

Or maybe just Wee Bastards.

Bahahaha, I think I like that one. 'Wee' brings up images of not just small, but cute as hell, too. Cute, which Wee Bastards certainly aren't. I am American though, so that's just my exposure to wee, which we don't use here much.

This has slid for a while now. Maybe too long. Can we at least pick a name other than midget?

I know a lot of people have argued that just changing the name is rather superficial, and that it's the whole racial characteristics that needs to be looked at. They have a good point. But the name is at least a start.

We've just received a distraction to say that the term midget is in itself considered a slur where the petitioner lives, and we can at least change that.

So - can we have an executive decision on a new name please CMJ? Then I can get stuck in going through the wiki and changing it all.

Going back over this topic, another idea came to me. Instead of the Midgets just being a play on dwarves, why not have them be a play on all the tiny fantasy creatures? Fairies, sprites, pixies, gnomes, the Iris- I mean leprecauns. We'd be able to keep Midgets' physical characteristics as well as add new ones. And honestly, who doesn't want a Midget with giant butterfly wings?

That doesn't fix the name problem, though. Best I can think of would be Fetcher, as a play on fey. I'm her Fetcher godmoudder, innit.

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For rent: one skull, in serious need of dusting.

A. Right now, we could do a patch that changed the name and nothing else. Benefit: We'd no longer be using a word that in some parts of the world turns out to be a nasty slur. It would be labour-intensive, but much of it can be done by moderators, so it is doable.

B. In Season Three, Midgets can be rethought to be something entirely different. We have CMJ's word that this is going to happen. Only CMJ can do it. (Or in a fit of creative inspiration he might avoid the issue altogether by some ingenious reworking of the entire concept of a character. You never know.)

This thread is doing a great job of mixing ideas for parts A and B together as if they were one thing, but they aren't.

As I see it, we have two options here:
1. A + B.
2. {do nothing now} + B.

I hereby volunteer for Option 1: Do a new-name patch now and address the rest of it in S3. CMJ, what'll it be? Give us the replacement name, tell folks it's happening via MoTD, and turn us loose on... the Wiki, the monsters, and as much of the game text as you'll let me touch with the translate engine.

If those are the only two options, I'd honestly rather have B, in the hopes that it'd spur Joe on to finishing S3 before the inevitable heat death of the universe. But if I could suggest an alternative?

Do a race rewrite contest like the Robo-Heart one. Stipulate that the Midgets need to keep their in-game characteristics (so Joe doesn't have to actually make a new race) and have people vote out of the top, say five, that Joe chooses. While the voting's going on, you can figure out a suitable name and start Ctrl+F Ctrl+X Ctrl+Ping everything. Then have a small Thing that fits the winning idea in to canon and explain why the Midgets changed their looks/name.

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For rent: one skull, in serious need of dusting.

We're going with Squats. Don't bugger about with the translation engine - I'll make it a codey project, maybe this weekend.

Sorry this has been so damn slow, I got caught up in fucking dayjob/freelancing bollocks.

Hurray! Squats it is, then.

As for voting-in an official story to fit it into canon? My advice is, don't.

Officially, let's just say there was a ripple of Improbability across the Island, after which the height- and manners-challenged residents of Squat Hole had always been called Squats. It only makes sense. Why else would the place be called Squat Hole? ...What? Midgets? What you talkin' about?

Oh, right. Some Islanders may be immune by now to the memory-modifying effects of Improbability. It happens. They may remember that the race used to be called Midgets in much the same way as some remember that they used to be able to pry cameras open for req, or that there used to be trains. If they're veterans, they know that sometimes you just have to shrug and accept that weird changes happen.

Unofficial stories, though? Go nuts.

But that's boring. You could at least have a group of community-minded Midgets, say the Society for Height-Impaired Tolerance, that calls for (read: demands with threats of violence) them to stop being called Midgets.












And I still really don't like Squat.

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For rent: one skull, in serious need of dusting.

Go for it. It sounds fun!

And someone else might have an even more amusing idea. Hard to believe, I know, but Islanders are a talented bunch. Why should we all be in lockstep? That would be boring. Not having a canon story means freedom to make up anything you please and have that be your explanation.

If there's an official explanation, it'll have to stand up to all the nitpickers like me who'll point out, logically and unfairly, that the Midgets have been threatening and delivering violence since the beginning of time. Why would Jokers, or Robots, or anyone, really, suddenly change their habits of speech, all in unison, because the Midgets demanded it? No, as far as I am concerned, the only way a mass change like that could suddenly happen is Improbability.

But comedy doesn't need consistency. Go ahead and RP the demands of S.H.I.T. -- I'll bet you make it hilarious.

Not everyone will. But CMJ does, so it's settled. We'll get used to it soon enough. So will the Midgets Squats.

Instead of debating the issue, why not discuss what we can do with the term. For example, "You don't know squat" means "You don't know anything", similar to "You don't know jack", and "diddly squat" means "nothing". At least this is American English slang - the meaning may vary around the world.